cycle of happiness

               My grandma passed away when I was just four due to lung cancer. This left my grandpa alone for many years, and he filled that void through family. When I was young, my grandpa would use all of the money from his pension to take our family and my aunts family on cruises with him. We would go once to twice a year, and he would pay to take all 7 of us on these vacations with him. My grandpa grew up without a mother, to a cold father who had difficulty showing love. My grandpa grew up to share many of these qualities. A man of the navy, who was deaf from being so close to loud firing so often. He was a hardened man who also seemed cold at a distance, but his love for family was always so clear.

               After years of cruises, one year we finally did not go on one. My mom told me that Sam just wasn’t feeling good enough that summer, and we were going to go next year. The next year came and he still wasn’t well enough. This wasn’t a big deal nor did we throw fits, for we were not spoiled. Instead we went out as a family to eat every Sunday, picking up my grandpa on our way to meet our aunt at the same restaurant. Nearly every restaurant we made a tradition of going to was unanimously hated throughout the family, but we all pretended to like them for grandpa.

               The beginning of my freshman year of high school started poorly. Ninth grade was definitely the most difficult year of high school for me, and the year started off terrible. From under achieving in classes, to just trying to figure out how to fit in, it was another rough year of school. However in November, my mother, brother, and I went to visit my grandpa Samuel. When my mother, brother, and I went to visit him that time in November something was different. He was telling my mom thank you. For everything she’d always done, and for being an amazing daughter. He told my brother and I similar stuff and I broke down. He knew that night he was going to die. He knew the next time he closed his eyes to go to bed, it would be the last. He showed so much love that night and said so much he never was able to tell us.

               Sure enough, he passed away that night. A week later we had the funeral. So many people came, family, friends, and nearly his whole retirement home came on buses. I gave a speech and may have cried a little bit while talking, but my uncle came up and made everyone laugh to end it.

 The next week after school, my mom woke me up from an after school nap and told me I had to go meet my travel baseball coach to get fitted for our new uniforms for the season. I dragged myself in her car reluctantly. However, instead we wound up at a puppy store. For the past three years, I had been asking for my own dog. We already had a shih tzu, but he was our dog, and all I wanted through middle school was my own dog, to sleep with every night and to sit on my lap while I watched tv. Inside was a yorkie my mom had already bought waiting to be picked up. I named him Samuel, or Sammy for short. This little puppy brought my mother, brother and I so much joy at a dark time. Happiness and sadness occur like day and night. When happiness leaves your life, it will always find its way back in your life in another form or messenger. Looking back at this lesson I learned then as I’ve aged and gone through even harder times always keeps me going. The night is always darkest before the sun rises. That quote is in The Dark Knight, so I had to throw it in too. 11/10, go watch that movie if you haven’t.